I had half a mind to call the Herald, but I already knew how the conversation would go:
Them: “Albany Herald.”
Me: “Is Harold there?”
Them: “This is the Herald.”
Me: “So, Harold, why did you leave out a picture of Ron Paul in your article about the Republican primary? You managed to include everyone else, and even throw in Obama.”
Them: “Oh, that. It was an honest mistake.”
Me: “Ah, yes. An honest mistake that just happened to exclude Ron Paul.”
Them: "As Rick Perry would say: 'Oops.' ”
And that would be that. So I didn’t bother calling.
And of course the “honest mistake” line would be a lie. I’m not that stupid.
Mistakes like that don’t just happen. Someone made it happen.
Even my high school newspaper never made that kind of a screw up, even when I tried to screw things up. Twice during my senior year I tried to slip something in, and both times the mistake police (or rather, prank police) caught me right before going to press.
This was when we literally cut-and-pasted the pages together. Think X-ACTO knives, glass cutting boards, and paste.
Once, a photo of me pitching was on the back page of the paper. I found a stray jet-black scrap that looked like a huge mustache and pasted it onto my 17-year-old mug. Then I crossed my fingers and hoped no one would notice. This was a big mustache. Bigger than Cesar Geronimo’s in 1982:
I tried again a few weeks later. And this time, there was no way I would be caught. Buried inside the paper was a listing of all the seniors and what they planned to do after high school. A typical listing was something like, "Susie Smith, University of Oregon."
In Portland, there is a Cleveland High School (I went to Wilson High School). Back in the day, their nickname was the Indians. Also, our sports teams played at the AAA high-school level. So . . .
I found one scrap that said "Cleveland Indians" and one that said "AAA," and by the time I was done, my post-high-school plans said, "Tom Kowitz, Cleveland Indians AAA."
Like I said, there was no way I could get caught. The list had nearly 500 names, in maybe 7-point type. This was going to be awesome.
Except some freakazoid of an editor, a high-school kid with no sense of humor and no soul, caught it.
And I'm to believe that somehow the editors at the Albany Herald can't catch a huge and obvious mistake on page one above the fold?
Ain't buyin' it.