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Baldy's Bombast
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September 13, 2010
Valiant bureaucrats in the Ministry of Food Production protect helpless citizens from dangerous Georgia farmer
Comrades, I have news that is joyous and alarming at the same time. Our brave officers in the Ministry of Food Production are working diligently in their battle to win yet another victory for the People. We know the efforts of these valiant Friends of the People bring you great joy, but the battle against overproduction of food never ends. The latest Enemy of the People is a dangerous farmer in DeKalb County, Georgia (U.S.A., not U.S.S.R.), who was growing more food on his land than we can allow! The malevolent farmer is now in compliance with our Sensible Rules For Safe Living and Getting Along With All, but we have a disturbing problem. He is in compliance only because the land was re-zoned so as to allow the farmer to grow his current levels of food! The evil bureaucrat who re-zoned the farmer's property has been dealt with in accordance with Comrade Stalin's Plan to Ensure Loving and Safe Communities.
The Ministry of Food Production has found a brilliant new strategy to protect the People. It is suing the nasty farmer not because he is currently growing too much food. After all, he is not growing too much food, now that his land has been re-zoned. No, the Ministry of Food Production is suing the farmer because prior to his land being re-zoned, he WAS growing too much food.
This masterstroke of bureaucratic genius is sure to end in a great victory for the People!
Valiant bureaucrats in the Ministry of Food Production protect helpless citizens from dangerous Georgia farmer
Comrades, I have news that is joyous and alarming at the same time. Our brave officers in the Ministry of Food Production are working diligently in their battle to win yet another victory for the People. We know the efforts of these valiant Friends of the People bring you great joy, but the battle against overproduction of food never ends. The latest Enemy of the People is a dangerous farmer in DeKalb County, Georgia (U.S.A., not U.S.S.R.), who was growing more food on his land than we can allow! The malevolent farmer is now in compliance with our Sensible Rules For Safe Living and Getting Along With All, but we have a disturbing problem. He is in compliance only because the land was re-zoned so as to allow the farmer to grow his current levels of food! The evil bureaucrat who re-zoned the farmer's property has been dealt with in accordance with Comrade Stalin's Plan to Ensure Loving and Safe Communities.
The Ministry of Food Production has found a brilliant new strategy to protect the People. It is suing the nasty farmer not because he is currently growing too much food. After all, he is not growing too much food, now that his land has been re-zoned. No, the Ministry of Food Production is suing the farmer because prior to his land being re-zoned, he WAS growing too much food.
This masterstroke of bureaucratic genius is sure to end in a great victory for the People!
